You know that point where you get so depressed because you realize you're not getting anywhere near to Allah?

In fact, I feel myself getting further. But He is the Most Merciful so He is always reminding me. Even when I'm getting further.

I'll do better. Sometimes a part of me just wants to abandon all the worldly things like making money and just focus on akhirat. But I know this is not the way. I have to find the balance. Let's be honest, I'm not even anywhere near abandoning my dunya. I just want to put my focus more on Akhirat right now.