hey guys

25 days later and i still have no answers

to what? i have no idea either hahaha. i had this interesting conversation with a colleague who said that if i am so fickle minded, it is most likely that i will be staying at my current workplace for a while. he's right. i am still working there. there are days where i thought of quitting and i don't want to divulge into reasons why because it will only make me sound like a loser. but there are just some days where i want to stay and continue learning over there. i have somewhat great colleagues. what i don't like is that i am their bahan bully. but whatever, i'm strong enough for that.

to add on, i have motivation. it's stupid but there's a certain presence there that keeps me going. it's making my heart beat faster just thinking about it and i haven't felt like this for a long time. as usual, it will always and forever be hidden feelings. but most importantly, my family. i have them. they may not be much of an encouragement but working and being able to provide them something keeps me going. i want to be able to provide them such that they do not have to work so hard anymore. i want my parents to have a rest. it is time since they're not getting any younger(duh) but unfortunately, i'm not there yet. when?

so.... what are my plans now? i plan to continue working as a full-timer and start school, in sha Allah, by next year.

let's see.

till then, all the best to me!

xoxo,
princess fy