Why do I have friends yet feel like I've no one to talk to?
Why am I surrounded by people yet feel so alone?

I realise our lives is full of contradictions.

We feel one way yet do the other. No, I don't think it makes us a bad person in anyway. It depends though. Unless you say things like you don't like to lie yet you lie all the time.

Anyway, I really don't feel comfortable talking to the people around me. I feel like whatever concerns I have are just minor but it's eating me up inside. Why is it ok for them to tell me things but when I do, I feel like they're not listening at all? I get really passionate and excited when I start to talk about things I like but I think they never understand. I don't blame them, I can be a weird person to be with.

I really don't like to be talked about in a bad way. I always try to refrain from adding comments and getting involved but sometimes it can't be helped. I'm not a good person overall, I just strive to be one. I'm not like a pure holy person but it's my ultimate goal to be a good, useful person. Sounds simple, isn't it? Not so when you're human. I make mistakes I'm not proud to talk about. Yes, I hide them. Only Allah SWT knows and I'm thankful, so thankful He's keeping it safe from others.

I guess this is it. I need to put it in words. I have to change. Isn't my goal to be a better person? I believe He's trying to bring me to the right path and I should go along. I shouldn't be so difficult. I mean, after all, this life is for the Hereafter. What am I doing still so concerned about the here and now?

I have Allah SWT. Why am I sad about not having anyone to talk to? Why? I just need to make the first move. How will I find the person I love if I don't love Him, the Creator enough? I hope this is the right thing to say.

It'll be all right, everything will end well.
In shaa Allah, amin

Besides, I have here, this blog so really, I don't have to be worried.

xoxo,
princess fy